Why is my friend persistently single?


Such a great guy, accomplished alternative medicine healer, great musician, but so single. Is it obvious from his chart?Image Alt Text


I would only add that with Saturn in the 5th and Leo ruled by Sun in the 4th, here is someone who has expectations about relationships based on the parental situation. Sun with Orcus is a guy whose identity is that of a ‘loner’, so he would be uncomfortable in anything but a very ‘cool’ partnership, exacerbated by the square to Uranus in the 7th. The 7th is ruled by Moon conjunct Pluto. So mother is the issue. He doesn’t trust women because mother didn’t make a good model of unconditional love, and actually he probably confuses respect and status with love; i.e. Saturn in Leo, early difficulty with easy warmth and affection in romantic relationships. He will find it much easier when past midlife, but even so, he will always be identified as a man apart, slightly isolated and lonely, because of Sun/Orcus.

There are some telling observations in the previous answer too. I would add that with Venus ruling all those 6th house planets there is a very social set of values, and relationship values too. Opposition Neptune? Idealistic. So he is someone who wants a sociable and exciting lifestyle (and he’s very easy-going and gregarious) and that is going to make a serious and committed relationship feel like heavy-going for him. He gets the intensity he needs through his work of course.

There’s much more of course. Chiron rising in Taurus and the 1st is echoed by Mars on the cusp of the 2nd. There’s much sensitivity to financial independence, another hurdle to commitment, because he likes to keep his money for himself, not least because he’s probably very good at spending his money on socialising and having a good time, I bet that has caused arguments in relationships in the past; just another factor that will make him wary.

With Sun/Uranus, and Uranus in the 7th, he is always going to struggle to compromise, he likes to do things his way, and a partnership of equals is going to be tricky. He needs to do plenty of work on resolving his maternal issues, then get into intimacy in a committed and intentional way, but he’ll struggle to make any headway with that before he’s 40 or so I would guess.

Good luck! Jeremy


Answered almost 6 years ago
jeremy 19
from unknown
almost 6 years ago memyself&why said:

Thanks for taking the time. I’m curious how he will react to your great reading.


For starters, in his natal chart (I don’t see a need to look farther), he has Uranus in the 7th house in out-of-sign square to his 4th house Sun. While Chiron is opposed to Uranus, I tend to avoid using Chiron with the same direct impact that I would a planet/luminary, so I’d be more likely to see this as a square between Uranus and the Sun and an opposition between Uranus and Chiron. He also has 2nd house Venus in opposition to Neptune. He also has all but two extraterrestrial planets below the horizon, so he really doesn’t like to communicate and prefers to be more introspective than sharing.

IF he married, it would be because he decided to listen to the opinions of others and actually follow through, but it basically works like this instead:

He likes his freedom and space, and if someone starts to get too close, he’s going to be likely to toss up his hands and run, not walk, in the other direction. He has a 2nd quadrant, Western, below the horizon dominance. He has no interest in actual commitment regardless of what he may say. And with Venus in opposition to Neptune, I’d be inclined to say he doesn’t trust someone to take all his money (if he has any…remember, the second house is about one’s value system too), so if he’s afraid of being hurt, for example, he’d see this as a value issue related to trust. He is the most important component in any relationship from his way of seeing it, so I doubt he’d be interested in pursing beyond that alone.

The heartbeat of his chart falls on the single component of the Moon. His Moon is conjunct Pluto. I’d say he’s afraid of losing himself, his money, anything related to things he associates with himself. He’s simply not interested. What he says and what he does aren’t going to be necessarily on the same level. It doesn’t seem like he really wants to look. If he’s comfortable with where he is, he can tell you he’s miserable for instance and not seriously be looking at all.

Hope that helps.

Answered almost 6 years ago
youngmichelle 2475
from United States
almost 6 years ago memyself&why said:

Thanks Michelle, great insight!


Why hasn’t anybody mentioned his Nodes? The Nodes are the ultimate keys to the past and the future.

South Node describes the Karmic Past. Your friend’s is in Aries – the sign of the warrior, the trail blazer, the ass-kicker. Aries can be anti-social, it does it’s own thing. He has spent many lifetimes on his own.

His Aries South Node is in the 12th House – the House of secrets and self-undoing. He’s done himself in through being too indepenent, too much of an ass-kicker even the type of ass-kicking was being the top guy at his school of alternative healing.

I’m sure he’s a nice guy. He is a Cancer Sun, Libra Moon. That’s the same Sun/Moon combo of Derek Jeter. I call it combo of “The Smooth Operator”: http://savinarholistic.com/?p=3151 So if he’s persistently single it’s not because he’s an overly awkward dweeb or raging a-hole or anything like that.

His North Node is in Libra – the sign of partnership, balance, diplomacy. Working to be not so damn independent is the karmic work to be done in this lifetime.

does he play his music and ply his trade on his own or with a partner? Try finding another person to play/work with on a consistent basis, even if it is not a romantic thing. Get used to doing things with others.

His Moon (instincts) is in the same sign as his NOrth Node. He should be able to pull this off. He had better because with Pluto (terror, extremes, regeneration) he is going to have to. Pluto on the North Node: “get your karma straight or die trying”

Best of luck,



Answered almost 6 years ago
matt savinar 4
from unknown
almost 6 years ago youngmichelle said:

Nice observations, Matt. I focus on exoteric, however, in contrast to your focus on the esoteric.


with uranus in 7th house shows a divorce aspect and needing lots of freedom within relationships… ruler of 1st and 7th are in trine aspect showing easy flowing energies and good connections with partners.

ruler of 7th in 6th shows he would meet potential partners via work environment and daily routines. BUT pluto is conj moon and this shows emotions are intense, controlling, passionate and this doesn’t sit well with people who ‘need’ a lot of freedom and independence. It’s almost a contradiction in terms

Next lilith is conjunt 7th ruler pluto and moon

“Libra – Lilith in Libra may find herself concerned with the legalistic side of power. She is a defender of women here, supportive of laws that curtail abuse or sexual crimes. Taken to extremes, Lilith in Libra may be vindictive against those she perceives to be offenders, and in relationships may be clinging, jealous or manipulative.”

“conjuncting your Moon, but widely..it still is influensed thou. For Lilith on IC – check the message yto Stella as she has that aspect too. As for your Moon/Lilith conjunction – a major aspect of the Black Moon Lilith to the Moon tends to add depth and stamina to it. The Moon, which by itself can be rather mellow, is reinforced by the qualities of independence and originality associated with the Black Moon, which many astrologers associate with Lilith the rebel, the woman who was created at the same time as Adam, not after him, and who separated from him because she could not bear to be subjected to his authority. The Moon and Black Moon are both related to the subconscious and unconscious parts of the psyche. People with this aspect are likely to be quite in touch with the depth of themselves. Consequently, at times there will be extremely violent emotions – the monsters of the depth are not buried far away, as they are in most people; they tend to manifest more directly in the person’s mind. But on the higher mode, the result of a Black Moon – Moon major aspect can be an exceptional intuition. In particular, the person can understand other people and feel what they feel as if they were inside them. There is also likely to be easy access to clairvoyance and higher aspects of spiritual Sight” http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12179

Moon conj pluto shows power struggles with mother, poss being very controlling, domineering, and conj Lilith a complete ‘bitch’ this alone could put someone off commiting in marriage. Ask him about his childhood and verbal abuse??

http://www.astrotherapy.eu/BlackMoon.htm further reading here

Answered over 5 years ago
saggimc 3484
from United Kingdom


Orcus conjunct the Sun asks us to delve deep and deeper into what we truly see, what makes us angry and what creates our fears, what is our personal emotional response to such actions. by Kim Gould

Answered about 5 years ago
xenia 292
from unknown


I heard that with Scorpio Descendant you can be extra careful with choosing your partners and perceive them as potentially overly secretive and even vengeful. True?

Answered about 5 years ago

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